Trying Hard
by OmegaDx23
Summary: It's been almost 10 months since the break up. Freddie sits in his room and thinks about their relationship. Bad at summaries. Freddie POV.


**A/N: Well, I'm here with my first story… just something I thought up and typed in about 15 minutes. Wait, you shouldn't be reading this… stop reading this! You should be reading the story right now. **

**Disclaimer: I really wouldn't be own this website if I owned **_**iCarly**_**.**

**Trying Hard**

**(Freddie POV)**

It's been almost exactly 10 months since Sam and I... well... broke up. Wow... 10 months and I still love her more than anything. I can't believe I went so long without being her boyfriend. I miss her... so much. Her beautiful, curly hair, that shines like the sun. I miss her curves, her beautiful, blue eyes that are like the ocean. I also miss her soft side that she doesn't like to show anyone. Wow. If Sam was in the room she would be telling me how much of a nub and a sap I am. I remember the first time she had shown me her softer side. I remember it clearly.

**(Flashback)**

_Sam and I were in my room laying together on my bed watching Galaxy Wars (Which she complained about for the first 15 minutes of the movie) and talking about random things such as school, iCarly, and about our relationship. It wasn't until the movie ended that I realized Sam was unusually quiet. I decided to see what was up and when I looked at Sam's face I saw tears sliding down her face._

_"Hey, Sammy... what's the matter?" I just had to ask because this is the second time I've ever seen Sam cry in my life (The night of the school lock-in being the first)._

_"N-nothing, it's nothing b-baby." She replied while stuttering._

_"Sam, you can tell me anything. Why are you, the great and powerful Samantha Puckett crying?"_

_"It's just... I-I... I can't tell you."_

_"Come on... tell me." I had to at least try to get her to tell me something._

_"It's going to be senior year soon... I-I was just thinking about how things are going to be like after we graduate." She had stopped crying now, but looking into her eyes, I know there are going to be more in the near future._

_"Well... we're going to be done with Ridgeway." I told her._

_"No. I'm talking about colleges Freddie." She's really serious... she called me Freddie._

_"What about it?"_

_"Carly is planning on going to NYU and you are planning on going to M.I.T."_

_"You're scared that we are going to leave you behind... aren't you?" I asked knowingly._

_"Yeah… My grades aren't good enough to get me into a great college near either of you guys. I can probably get in NSCC... you know, North Seattle Community College or maybe the University of Washington. You'll be all the way in Massachusetts."_

_"Hey, I didn't say that M.I.T. was the only college I'm interested in." I said. " I already planned on applying for University of Washington. It's a great opportunity and I get to be with you."_

_"I... it's just... (Sigh)."_

_"Sam, everything will be alright. Let's not worry about it until the time comes. As for now, we can spend our time together...stay in the present. I know we will have a great future...together." I leaned in and we shared a passionate kiss._

**(End of Flashback)**

I couldn't have been more wrong. Now I'm just sitting here on my bed just realizing how big an idiot I am. I made the biggest mistake ever. That mistake was letting Sam go...that night in September. I could've stopped us from breaking up. I can't stop thinking about her. I just can't. I love her so much and I know that I may never get another chance with her. After the way I've been acting during the past month or so... I think she wouldn't ever want to be with me. I have to make it up to her. I have to get her back.

We listened to Carly and tried to be her version of the "perfect couple" and now look where we are. I can't blame it all on Carly though. It was our faults for listening to what she said. It was our faults. We weren't forcing a relationship and it wasn't weird. Why did we listen to her?

I've been feeling miserable ever since. I can honestly say that I know what being heartbroken feels like. I've tried so hard not to show any signs of sadness, heartbreak, or any other emotion that can reveal everything that I'm feeling. I think I should stop though because things are just getting worse for me. Every night when I sleep, I dream of Sam. I'm always thinking about her.

I've never felt this way about another girl in my life and I don't think I ever will. Sure I had a crush on Carly years ago, but that's all it was, a crush. I was always following Carly around like a love sick puppy. I was stuck to her like white on rice. Enough with that, but I'm over her. I'm in love with Sam and I don't know if I can go any longer without telling her that I still love her. What in the hell was I thinking? I let the best thing that ever happened to me... Sam... I let her go. Damn it. I am such an idiot.

I have to do it. At the lock-in I told Sam to basically make a move because you'll never know what would happen if you don't. I'm going to take my own advice and make a move. I may not do it today or tomorrow, but I will do it soon. I'll take the risk of being rejected... but I'll do it. I'll do it because... I love you Sam, now and always.

**A/N: That's the end of this little thing here. I'm not going to lie…this could've come out a little better. It'll have to do though because it's 4:17 A.M. here in Washington D.C. and I'm tired. Oh, yeah… almost forgot. Review and tell me what I can do better and what you thought about it. Omega is gone!**


End file.
